Remembering the true meaning of Christmas. One by one, candles are given light to represent the light of Christ spreading from person to person; illuminating the world. Even in times of darkness, remember Jesus is the light of the world.
Purity is what I strive for daily, some days are better than the other. Purity has many definitions. In recent times "purity" has become a staple for parents to teach their children abstinence. There are Purity Dances with fathers and daughters, purity, true love wait, chastity, promise and abstinence rings that have become very popular among teenage girls and boys.
"Purity is the absence of impurity or contaminants in a substance. The absence of vice in human character. The state or degree of being pure." Wikipedia
When I began recovery it was a difficult task to achieve living my life in a pure way. For too many years I had been doing just the opposite, living my life impure. Contaminating my body with drugs and alcohol, lying, cheating, stealing, living and loving selfishly. Impure thoughts, actions, reactions. In active addiction it was my way of life. In every form and fashion I thought I was living a good life and did not realize I was not until I found sobriety and began to live my life in a sober way. There is a difference between "being sober" and "living sober".
Though I have been sober for 7 years, my old ways can easily sneak back into my life. When they do I am more aware and acknowledge to myself and God that I need help fighting off the demons. I turn to God to help me because it was only through him that I was able to put down the bottle. I had to turn my addiction over to a Higher Power, to which I call God.
There certainly have been struggles in the past 7 years, however I know now when I am not living my life in a pure fashion/manner. Every morning I pray to God to continue to embed Purity as my way of life, in everything that I do. Thanking him for the humility that he has also embedded into my soul. Thanking him for the roof over my head, the clean sheets, the hot water, as I have been without those before.
It is easy to get caught up in worldly day to day problems and to complain about matters or instances in our lives. I have and sometimes fall backwards into this pattern of life. Through Recovery I have learned to be grateful for the simple pleasures in life that I once took for granted.
"Purity is not just the way we act, but it is out entire conversation. It is our thoughts, words and deeds that show our true heart's intent". What I strive for daily. God Speed.
We don't expect friends to be in perfect health all the time. We know that they will have issues to deal with as they walk along their own paths. We encourage them. We pray for them. But we don't take their issues as our own, and we don't take it personally when they need some time to focus on their own personal growth.
In friendships, one person does not hold all the power. So despite the differences in our lives, we try to relate as equals.
We're tolerant of cycles in our friendships, knowing that at different times, each person has different needs, different experiences to go through. Sometimes there's more time and energy to devote to the friendships. Other times, there's less.
We don't expect our friends to be at our side twenty four hours a day. We have our time together and value that, but then we each go our own way. We don't try to force bonding with friends, or even force the relationship to be a friendship too fast. We let ourselves go through experiences together naturally, knowing that that's how bonding takes place.
I'm not an expert on marital love, but we might have a better chance at finding love if we treated our lover like a friend.
God, help me find the middle ground between unrealistic expectations and no expectations at all. Help me cherish my relationships and not confuse heavy drama with romantic love.
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that. It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous. . . . Life will mean something at last.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 152
Life is better without alcohol. A.A. and the presence of a Higher Power keeps me sober, but the grace of God does even better; it brings service into my life. Contact with the A.A. program teaches me a new and greater understanding of what Alcoholics Anonymous is and what it does, but most importantly, it helps to show me who I am: an alcoholic who needs the constant experience of the Alcoholics Anonymous program so that I may live a life given to me by my Higher Power.
From the book Daily Reflections
When I first found Recovery AA was the key to my sobriety. While my parents taught me from a young age the importance of a relationship with God and church, after moving out of their house I had fallen from that. It was embedded in me and once the fog grew clear I began incorporating God, as my Higher Power, and am now able to take a much broader approach on staying sober. I turn My Will and My Way over to him to lead me in my daily endeavors. If it were not for God and turning my addiction over to him with the help of the program, I would be not the person I am today. He is my strength, my love, my Knight in Shining Armor. Godspeed.
I am bringing greater clarity in distinguishing the difference between faith and hope. Your prayers must be established in absolute faith, without any doubt whatsoever; according to My will, says the Lord. If you find that you are in a double-minded position, take the time and effort to suss out any place of fear or unbelief that would undermine your faith. Then, make the necessary corrections so that whatever you ask in My name will be done.
James 1:5-8 If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. SMALL STRAWS IN A SOFT WIND by MARSHA BURNS
I have been demanding for some major life changes to occur in my life. Not just asking from God but Demanding that these life changes occur now and it is time for them to happen. He has made one of the three occur and is showing me he is building the way for the other two. By opening paths and stages and occurrences in my life to show me the doors have opened and I am about to step into the new life I have been demanding.
The major one I have been Demanding from God is coming forth, but it was not coming in the way I had groomed it to my imagination. He has set forth tests in my faith in him and is making me step out of my comfort zone to make it come to fruition. I didn't realize I had a fear of it while I was Demanding it from God. I shared what I had Demanded from God to a Godly friend of mine,asking it to come to fruition and she explained to me I still had the Spirit of Fear in me while Demanding from God to make this happen. In her teachings to me, she taught me that I had to cast out the Spirit of Fear to be blessed from God of my demands. It took me a few days to really understand what she was teaching me. As it resignated in me, I did cast out the Spirit of Fear and as she told me, when you cast out a Spirit of Fear or any other, i.e. resentment, anger, depression, that the Devil will try and fill it with 7 other fears or defiances. She said you must then ask God to fill that void with what you want you in your life before the devil takes that void. I asked of God to fill the void with clarity, peace, serenity and many more.
In a matter of days my life changed. My Demand from God of this Major Life Change began to take root and the doors became wide open. He has made this come to fruition in a matter of a two weeks. I am in amazement and awe of what prayer and God can do in my life.
A simple occurrence happened last week and I was crying myself to sleep. Asking God to comfort me and I had to cast out the Spirit of Fear once again. I was begging God to hold me as I fell asleep and asked him to let me know he was here and was hearing me. I felt God put his two hands on my back ask I prayed for this doubt to go away. As I awoke a song was playing in my head. I had heard the song several times but didn't know the words by heart but did that morning. I began crying and thanking God that morning because he had just answered my prayers in a way I had never experienced. The song is by Phillip Phillips, Home. And so it is...
Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny. May God bless you and keep you-until then.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 164
The Teaching is never over. Everyday I feel I grow closer to God, my Higher Power, but didn't realize I was missing fellowship with friends that are Christians and that are strong in the word and preachings of God. There are many faults I have admitted to my fellow friends in Recovery and those not in Recovery and also ones that I asked for forgiveness, while not pointing the finger at them and pointing out my faults and my wrong doings. This is a difficult action to do, not telling the other that "I did this because you acted like this", or "if you would not have done that, I would not have acted that way". I have been able to make amends to most of the people I have hurt and taken down my pride and ego and admitted my faults to them. Recovery has taught me that this is the only way I can have a clear conscious to be able to live my life without chains being tied to me, Rigorous and Complete Honesty. I still have amends I have to make to others, that including to the children from my past marriage. I pray for them every night and that one day God will allow me to see them again to make amends for my actions during my active addiction in my past marriage.
I was proven the other day that The Teaching is Never Over because a friend and I were having breakfast and we were speaking of asking God for forgiveness, curses that are caused from generations past. She admitted to me something I would have never shared with anyone, a sin and one that I had done as well. It shocked me, but then I realized I was speaking to someone that was a Christian and preached the word and she was not ashamed to admit her faults to me. I would have taken this to the grave, but because she had already cleared her wreckage from her past I realized I could do the same. Admitting this horrendous sin to another human being gave me a sense of Freedom I had not felt since I began Recovery. The teaching is never over, I have found freedom on a new level because I have met someone that has led me down a new fork in the Road to Recovery and the Road to Happy Destiny. Godspeed.
you wear in life, may hide you from the world but at the end of the day the mask has to come off for you to sleep at night.
RIGOROUS HONESTY - Daily Reflections
Who wishes to be rigorously honest and tolerant? Who wants to confess his faults to another and make restitution for harm done? Who cares anything about a Higher Power, let alone meditation and prayer? Who wants to sacrifice time and energy in trying to carry A.A. 's message to the next sufferer? No, the average alcoholic, self-centered in the extreme, doesn't care for this prospect—unless he has to do these things in order to stay alive himself.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 24
I used to hide behind a mask in my world when I was not sober; a mask of lies, deceit, resentment, anger and selfishness. Small white lies, then deceit, lies that became bigger to cover up the little ones..oh, to the web we weave as if we were spiders...It became my way of life and I didn't even realize how much it encompassed my every being until I found Recovery and God.
It was a difficult process in the beginning because it was part of my disease, lying and being deceitful, and I would catch myself lying without even realizing I had done it until afterwards. The other day I realized I had embellished a story to make it seem much grander than it actually was. The embellishment didn't make the story better to the other person, it was my disease trying to make surface.
Today I know that I live my life with rigorous honesty. It is not fun to confess a fault to another, but I know I have to because at the end of the day my Higher Power, God, is the only one, besides myself, that knows the way I live my life.
Wearing a mask at the masquerade ball is easy to do and take off when you get home, however at the ball, your life, you are dancing with the devil. I choose not to wear a mask anymore, I choose God and Rigorous Honesty for my ball, my life. Godspeed
